Thursday, July 18, 2013

Comics Review: Uncanny X-Men #8


Written by: Brian Michael Bendis
Art by: Chris Bachalo

    When we last left the X-Men, Cyclops and his team were trapped in Limbo by the dreaded Dormammu. Magik helped out with that by basically going demon Super Saiyan and getting them the hell out. Also, one of their members quit, the mutant named...Gold Balls. Trust me, he didn't want the name to stick either. Going to Limbo after only being a mutant for not even a week was too much for him. He's just not ready now for that kind of job. But that's just the problems on the outside, don't forget about Magneto's betrayal of the X-Men, his reasoning being to gain the trust of S.H.I.E.L.D. so they'd lay off the team for a while. I don't think too many people are buying that anyways. But enough about the past, let's crack open these 24 pages of goodness and see what's going on in the now of the Uncanny X-Men. 


    We start out in San Diego, California. The house of Diego, A.K.A. Gold Balls, he's decided to go back home. That the life of the X-Men is not for him. He'll leave crime fighting for someone else. Cyclops and Emma Frost dropped him off, he apologizes for letting them down. Frost let's him know that he did not let them down, but he will if he doesn't try to do something about the world he lives in. If he doesn't try to make this world a better place for humans and mutants alike, THEN he will have let them down. Its time for mutants to stand back up and fight the oppression of the white man!...oh, damn, I mean the human man!!! But after the Avengers/X-Men rematch in Australia, no one is going unwatched. S.H.I.E.L.D. is closely watching this drop off for any suspicious activity. Back at the New Charles Xavier School, Emma and Scott return from the drop off. Most of the kids have questions about all this. Is he really gone? Will he be replaced? What happens now? Did they SERIOUSLY all almost go to hell just now? Scott answers most of those questions with a simple statement, that if the last couple hours has shown them all anything, its that the entire team is in some serious need of training. Thankful to hear about training, Warren, Angel, the time displaced X-Man from the past, tells everything that they think he's something great just because he was an original X-Man. Truth is, the kid doesn't even have any combat training, he just knows how to fly. Just before the training begins, Cyclops asks to have a private word with Magneto for a moment. 


    Meanwhile, elsewhere, there's another new mutant just discovering his powers. A young man in a parking lot full of cars. He's with who I can only assume is his girlfriend or something. He's just discovered that his power involves cars and their electrical systems or electricity in general of some sort. With just a thought, he starts all the cars engines, then shuts them off. With another thought, he turns on all their alarms, then back off. Just in time for two cops to comes and see what all the ruckus is about. The girl quickly sells him out, yelling that he's a mutant. So much for being a good friend, huh? These cops are definitely mutant haters. That could be a lifelong hatred, or a newly found one because of last summer's Phoenix bomb. Regardless, they're wrong and this isn't going to end well for anyone. The cops actually shoot the kid when he starts their car as a distraction and tries to run away. One cop runs after the car, but the other cop, the one who shot the boy to begin with stands over his body. Ready to shoot him again. A shot to kill. Luckily, Magik and the triplets are there to stop this and help the boy. The triplets play some games with the cops first, altering their minds so both cops are now pointing their guns to each others heads, then just making the guns float into their OWN mouths. These girls are sick...and I love it!!! The cops are finally dealt with and tossed into the background, now comes the young mutant's "friend". Magik sends her off fairly quickly, then asks one of the triplets to make it so the young boy feels no pain, after all, he's still got a bullet in him. Then, he blacks out.

     Outside the New Xavier School, Magneto has his talk with Scott. He knows Scott is having a hard time trusting him, because of his sell out in Australia. Erik reminds Scott that he's dedicated his life to the preservation of the mutant race and will not put the needs of human before the needs of mutant. He explains that he needed to sell out his team to make S.H.I.E.L.D. believe he's helping them. The only problem with Scott knowing Erik for so long and knowing his motives is...Scott's known Erik for so long and knows his motives. Scott's afraid that Erik may just see him as an obstacle in his path on the way to mutant dominance. Scott's got this idea that Magneto may want to punish him for his mistakes. For what he did to the X-Men, for what he did to Charles. After all, even though they were enemies, they were lifelong friends. But Magneto won't be that person. He says it's not his job to punish Scott Summers for the mistakes he's made. We learn that Erik may just never forgive Scott for what he's done, but he WANTS Scott to succeed. To help the mutant race. However oddly comforting that may be, it's not why Scott arraigned the meeting. Scott takes off his glasses and unleashes his best eye beam, it still isn't much. The five X-Men who controlled the Phoenix are broken, their powers cracked. They need to help each other get back to their full potential, or else how can they help young new mutants everywhere? 

Meanwhile, back inside, that new mutant from before, David, is finally waking up. All the students are curious like little forest critters, and he finally wakes up to see Angel in front of him. Well if that ain't some foreshadowing scary shit, I don't know what is. We cut back to San Diego where Fabio finally enters his home to greet his family. They're all so happy to finally have him back home and safe, but when he tells them he's a mutant, his father doesn't take too lightly. He wants to take him to the hospital to have him checked. Even his mother's convinced that the X-Men did experimental stuff to him. With their fear and pushing, and his stress, his mutant ability takes over. He starts shooting the golden spheres uncontrollably around the house, crashing out the window, through the walls, everywhere. Once it all calms down, there's a ring at the door. It's Dazzler, the newest agent of S.H.I.E.L.D. she wants Fabio to tell her exactly where a Mr. Scott Summers is.

I'm still pissed this book is monthly and not no-weekly like its other awesome X-Title, All New X-Men. I love how we're still seeing the effects of last summers Avengers vs. X-Men story to this day, almost a whole year later. Will the X-Men ever get their powers back? Will the team ever reconcile with Captain America and the Avengers? Will the human race ever, EVER coexist with mutants? And what EXACTLY is Magneto's plan for the team and S.H.I.E.L.D.? I know I'm not the only one with these questions for stay close for all the juicy details. Until next week.

-Matt Milanes

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