Saturday, January 11, 2014

Comics Review: Superman Unchained #5

Written By Scott Snyder
Pencils By Jim Lee
Inks By Scott Williams
Colors By Alex Sinclair
Flashback Art By Dustin Nguyen
Flashback Colors By John Kalisz

Tash Moore here. No new episode of The Verbal Mosh until mother nature chills out with that snow and crap. The postal service (not the band) is moving pretty slow. You’ll get a new episode soon so hold tight and keep warm. If you were smart you could just sleep with a cat for extra warmth. If it’s good enough for Bret Hart it’s good enough for you! Legit! Speaking of Babyfaces, I’m reviewing Superman Unchained #5 (or lets give Jim Lee a high profile book so we can justify what we pay him.)

This issue starts out with a young Clark Kent and Lana Lang playing back in Smallville.
 While playing on a silo they fall off and Clark uses his powers to save them both. That Clark I tell you, he’s a special kind of guy. I hope he grows up to do something meaningful with himself. Anyway back in the current time Lois Lane is taken hostage by a terrorist group called Ascension. Not really a name that will strike fear into anyone but hey, what do I know?

Superman is hanging around with Wraith who, if you know have been following along, has landed on earth looooong before Superman did. He’s also stronger and has a cool (90’s esque) hood. Jim Lee probably just took a look at Cyberforce from the 1990’s and said “ Fuck it” and swiped  Baddrock. Quick someone cut a check to Rob Liefield. Stat!

Ascension has Lois and tells her that they plan to take humanity back in time to save it from the like of Superman and Wraith and the U.S. Government. I’m also betting these guys are from Montana and don’t believe in the U.S. Postal System. Superman shows what type of trusting soul he is by taking Wraith to his FOS. (Fortress of Solitude.) Wraith then does an about face and swerve’s Superman and pulls out a Cable style gun ( I hope it works) and tells Supes that he’s taking all the alien tech and the FOS and will turn it over to Uncle Sam.

Ascension uses the Equation (sent to Earth along with a baby Wraith) to take control of every computer and hacks into every country’s weapons systems. Then they launch every nuclear warhead in the world. Then Batman shows up and says the exact same thing that I just said. Thank a lot Bats. Stick to what you do best, watching your folks get killed and doing nothing about while getting a reboot. Sounds good to me. I didn’t like the story when it first started but the ending was really cool. Didn’t see Wraith turning into a jerk but hey he is a secret agent for the U.S. so old big blue should have seen that a mile away. Still not a big fan of Jim Lee but he was serviceable, so I’ll give him that. Three stars and all that jazz.

-Tash Moore

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