Friday, March 7, 2014

Comics Review: Mighty Thor #209


Written By Gerry Conway
Pencils By John Buscema
Inks By Vinnie Colletta
Colors By Petra Goldberg


Hey there gang. Tash Moore here yet again talking about the Bronze Age tales of the Mighty Thor. You know, with some of the last few yarns Thor has been acting like a spoiled jerk. I guess you would act like that too if your high and mighty dad kicked you out of home then your one and only love gave herself up for you to save you from your homicidal half brother who also is the trickster god. Clearly. We’ve all been there before, Thor. Keep your chin up!


Our tale takes up to merry old England. Home of Big Ben, tea at midday, and Benedict Cumberbatch as Sherlock. (Suck it, CBS!) Thor is on the hunt for Sif and while landing decides to walk around in his human form of Dr. Donald Blake. Good idea. People tend to notice seven foot tall blond dudes in capes just hanging around.
But using the power of his hammer to change forms awakens The Demon Druid! That was really nice of Druid’s folks to map out his future for him like that. “ Daddy, I want to be a Doctor when I grow up!” “ Oh Druid you know that’s not for you. Now blow up this small village for dear old dad!”   It happened just like that. Or not.


I’d also like to point out that Dr. Donald Blake entered a pub and ordered a ham and cheese sandwich and a beer. See, that’s why Marvel Comics were so damn awesome. Dr. Blake can get a beer. Batman back in the camp days would have just ordered a soda without bubbles as to not hurt his little nosey. Back to the story, Druid is up and lumbering around and the Royal Army shows up and starts shooting him. He’s got this force field which repels bullets ( I know some famous Rappers who could have used that thing) causing him no harm.


Thor turns up to fight Druid. But unlike when Thor normally takes on a bad guy, Thor doesn’t dominate from the onset. In this fight he gets manhandled. Yes that’s right. Druid picked him up and swung him to sleep while feeding him a bottle. Or Druid just punched Thor in the face and knocked him out for 15 minutes. I like my version better. Thor then wakes up and goes after Druid again. Only to yet again get knocked out for two hours. For some reason this fight feels like it should be set to the Benny Hill theme while Loki points and laughs. During the knock out naps for Thor, one of the guys working for Scotland Yard (did I mention this story takes place in England?) notices the symbol on Druid's outfit and runs to the library.


After doing a little research, the Inspector recognizes that the symbol on Druid matches the very same one that is found at Stone Hedge. The Inspector tells all forces and Thor to stand back and don’t attack. Seeing as how Druid only attacks after being provoked. ( Just like the USA, baby.) Once reaching Stone Hedge, Druid uses it as a teleportation device to rejoin his people. Seems like he’d been left behind on Earth for Three Thousand Years!! Guess he woke up a little cranky from his long nap. Thor then stands in the rain looking up at the sky. This really had a strange Star Trek ending. You know, where things aren’t really what they look like on the surface. It was a fun issue to read. But it needs more Spock. Clearly. Anyway, Druid leaves back to the stars (No word on if he’s going to party with Aza Chorn. See The Verbal Mosh Episode 259 for more on Aza.) while Thor is left with an empty feeling.


-Tash Moore




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