Tuesday, February 3, 2015

Reboots and Relaunches February 2015

It’s so very good to be back. Tash Moore here and much like the final play of Super Bowl XLIX I’ll leave you scratching your head. That’s right, it’s the return of Reboots & Relaunches! I mean I’d have totally gotten to this sooner or later, but now seems like a pretty good time. I mean, it was really due in January but between trying to sort out Miracleman’s issue of if Johnny Bates is black or not or if we’d ever see another issue of the Dan Slott/Mike Allred Silver Surfer I just kind of lost track. Thankfully this website doesn’t have investors or stockholders. I’d be in a bind, you know, trying to explain how I just don’t feel like be hassled today. (Simpsons!) So now it’s time for the news that you can use and by use I mean the complete and total opposite of that, here we go.

Struggling Supergirl?!?

So CBS is still moving forward with it’s Supergirl TV show. They figured why should the CW and FOX make money off these funky dudes in tights? We’re America’s Number One network dammit! No doubt, this is most likely said by some network producer. Right before he went back to drinking his latte and then attempting to run reruns of the 1990’s Flash TV. (Which I’ll admit I fond memories for, but holy shit does it not age well. Like a Limp Bizkit song. Or hell, Fred Durst himself. Poor bastard!) So Melissa Benoist has been  tapped to be the CBS version of the Girl of Steel. So I’ve read that she’s been on Glee. Seeing as how I’m a full grown man and care for quality in my programming, I’ve never seen Glee. So I can say that I am heading into this show with fresh eyes and no judgment.
But holy crap can that soon change.  Also one new change is that Jimmy Olsen will be black. I’m fine with that too, but hopefully it isn’t change for the sake of, well you know, change. But I almost fell out of my chair when I heard her first bad guy that she’ll take on will be…wait for it…..Lumberjack. What the hell. Nothing like capturing the imagination of the public but floating that out to the world wide web.  Superman’s powered up cousin takes on a lumberjack. Talk about a backwards why to launch a possible show. Not really digging this, but hey, what do I know? Really, what is it that I do? Meh. I’ll leave the ripping apart of this show to message boards and the like. Me, I’ll just take a wait and see approach. Which I mean is all you can really do. I mean, it’s on freaking TV. So just wait….and see. Sounds about right to me.

Fantastic Flub!

So just yesterday, right after I spent what felt like forever shoving ice and snow I sat down and finally gave the new FOX Fantastic Four trailer a watch. Now well all know that this is kind of the situation where Marvel/Disney tried and failed to get the FF film rights back from FOX and it just didn’t happen. So, we’ve all pretty much heard that Marvel is going to do away with the Fantastic Four’s comic book and FOX is still planing to move forward with it’s own film reboot. First off, how stupid could Marvel be? They really think that just because they aren’t producing a Fantastic Four comic book that somehow people are not going to see this film? The people paying the big bucks to see these summer blockbuster films are not, I repeat, not shelling out the money to buy comics. If they were, the industry would not be shouting out how in one month they sold 100,000 units of Amazing Spider-Man. People who enjoy the films mostly do just that and maybe they do attempt to read the comics and with all the dumb ass start/stop rebooting/ relaunching (You see what I did there?) turns them off. Wait, I was getting to my Fantastic Four reboot rant. Okay, so I watched it. Boy, does the trailer make me never want to see this movie. It kind of makes me pine for the days of Richard Cormen. Right down from the goofy ass looking Reed Richards to the crappy voice over about man waiting to reach for new heights. Sounds like a nice pitch for Star Trek 3 but so out of line with Marvel’s First Family. I think this film is a flop and Fox will have but no choice but to fork over the Fantastic Four’s film rights. If not right after then I’d say by 2016.

Speaking of FOX, they plan to launch a X-Men live action TV show at some point next year. I know that has really got to grind the gears of the Marvel brass. No word on if Hugh Jackman will just around playing Wolverine, but hey it’s got to be better than that Mutant X show Fox tried to force down our throats back in the late 90’s early 2000’s. Bottom line is, it’s a pretty good time to be a fan of the funny books. People are really stating to take it as a legit art form. Too bad it’s 75 years after the fact but hey, beggars can’t be choosers. Or maybe they can. I know I would.

-Not So Secret Wars.

So word around the block is that Marvel has yet another big event. Which normally when Tom Breevort takes a shit, Marvel somehow tries to position this as a “Event” book to make sales. Know how slick the marketing department is I’m confident that they could pull it off. Hey, what can I say, those guys do good work. So Marvel got really, really lazy and just slapped the old Secret Wars logo from 1984 and just plans on doing a DC New 52 like reboot event. Which had been in the rumblings since two years ago when they stole I mean came up with the idea totally by themselves and didn’t steal it whatsoever. I’m okay with this but wow, did they really have to call it Secret War? The could have called it Spider-Point or Crisis on the 616 Earth. I know that it yet another cash grab to line the Disney pockets but damn, did it have to be so blatant? Some book I’ll keep on reading, you know like Amazing Spider-Man and Jeff Lemire is doing Hawkeye so I don’t want to pass that up. Damn you, Marvel. You used to be the House of Ideas. Now you’re more like a Xerox machine. Go figure. Well that’s all the complaints I got. I’ll be back in April with a new R&R. So until the New Marvel 52 rolls out Spider-Boy again, be good and read Warlord. (No really, it’s pretty damn good. Mike Grell FTW!)

-Tash Moore

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